waiting

to see if i have plans tonight...knowing kurt i doubt it though. i just want to see my bf! ah whatev. so anywho, family sucks. i want a new dad. good thing he's not really related to me. gahhhh. nothing like having the parole officer knock on the door with another cop and then proceed to handcuff my dad while he searches our house. i guess when you're on probation you're qualified to get random "search and seizures" or wtfever you call them. so i sat down with my little sisters in the living room while the cops proceeded to tear apart the upstairs then after they couldnt find anything they uncuff my dad and leave. fuck. i'm sure this experience is bound to have some psychological damage on my little sister. and fuck cops. seriously...find me a good one out there. because it seems like 99 out of 100 times you'll find an asshole cop. i dont know why they think they're so great. all they've ever done is cause stress on my family and friends. i wish i went a month without having any police contact whatsoever. fuck my life. i just want change. i want the ideal family. whatever happened to that. honestly what has happened to our society? i bet everyone knows someone with divorced parents or has divorced parents. where did true love go? on the subject of that word.....i'm falling pretty hard. it's scary. like jumping headfirst into a black hole. or being kicked into the giant hole in 300. i wish life was easy.