shithead mcgee showed up to the party i was at last night. i could barely breathe when i first saw him. i wanted to cry and i almost held it in but i couldn't. i wanted to talk to him and tell him how i felt, but i didn't thin a party was the right place to do it. i had to sit in between him and randall on the drive home and it was the most awkward ride ever. it felt like a three hour car ride when it probably on lasted twenty minutes. a part of me wants to stay mad at him and ignore him and be a bitch but the other part wants to talk to him and try to fix this. i'm so conflicted and i'm still in shock. he's being so immature about it too. he won't even look at me when i talk and he acts like i don't exist. i hope he feels like shit for what he did but knowing him be probably doesn't give a fuck about how i feel. i'm sure the other girl is better than me in so many ways. its a battle i'm probably going to lose.