Monday, October 26, 2009

well he never replied yesterday. so as luck would have it class was canceled and i got to go over to the high school to "confront" him at break. i was trying to tell him why i was mad at him but he walked away before i could even finish. its like he didnt even care. his excuse was he fell asleep at khas and then woke up and went to his house. so while walking to your house you couldn't reply to me?? ugh whatever. maybe i can FINALLY settle everything tomorrow. i haven't even gotten to talk to him about the whole him taking my money problem. i just want to fix all this so we can go back to how we were. happy. today kelsey asked me why i still like him after everything he's put me through and how come i don't hate him. i guess i don't really know. i just keep having hope that he'll appreciate me as much as i appreciate him or something like that. there are better guys out there for me but i don't want to look for them because i don't want to lose him. ugh. complicated shit. but theres such a close bond i don't know how life would be like without him there. he became my best friend since i had a shitty excuse for one. this is way too deep and i'm tired and i hate spilling my guts on here. so i'll bitch about how victoria invited me to go to vantage point to take pictures with her today around four but never called me to meet up even though i called her and texted her. oh but she could reply when i told her i got a costume. did you just forget we made plans to hang out or were you too busy dealing with aaron's shit again? why do i let myself put up with people that treat me like crap?

well fuck them. dirt nasty at slidebar on wednesday. halloween parties on friday and saturday. seeing steph on saturday and getting away from my "friends" and actually going to a party with people my age. all things to look forward to. and maybe we can for disneyland on sunday.

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